Friday, April 17, 2009

My Whacked-Out Poetry Phase

I wrote these two poems a few years ago. I have no idea what they're about or what I'm trying to say. Guess I was going through some sort of phase, not a T.S. Eliot phase, just a weird write-anything-down-and-call-it-a-poem phase. I have more and if my insides can take it, I'll post them. Please, don't judge.

On second thought, no one is forcing me to post these, so go ahead and judge all you want.  

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Falling rays beyond the hills;

      Seeping light on passers-by.

What's the cause say you;

            We all wonder with anticipation.

Night, My Master

Canvas lit so bright;

            Rain pounds the edifice.

Sing down, oh mighty thunder;

            Pour your soul onto us, Big Sky.

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7 comments:

  1. I'm going to treat the first poem as a riddle and say, "Alien spacecraft."

    I like the second poem quite a bit, although the second line, for me, shatters the imagery created in the first line. When I read "canvas" (and later, Big Sky) I pictured open land, like Wyoming maybe. But edifice made me picture a building, so the first image kind of blew up. Which is not to say that I've read the poem correctly at all. In fact, "edifice" might easily be interpreted more abstractly or it could be a poetic way to say mountain or plain or anything that is large and imposing and grand. In fact, yeah, I'm going to go with that. I like the second one.

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  2. Thanks, PMM. Nice, short critique. The first one does read like a climactic Spielbergian moment. And the second one does have some issues.

    It's fun to look back at stuff you write. Even if it doesn't make any sense to you now, it might make sense to someone else. The beauty and timelessness of words, I guess.

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  3. What do you think of Waiting for Normal?

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  4. School librarian handed it off to me before shelving it (Good to befriend those librarians). Read the first five chapters tonight. Fantastic opening and perfect voice. I'm trying to read a lot of first person right now since I'm writing Bird-Man Street in first.

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  5. I love the new photo!!!

    I know nothing about poetry...I keep researching it and reading it and I've even tried writing it...still don't get it.

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  6. Thanks for the compliment. I looked for hours for a photo. I like it too.

    Poetry can be fun because there aren't that many rules. I think it's either done well or done poorly, and you can usually tell as soon as you read a poem.

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  7. I also love the photo, and I feel special because I read your first chapter, so I totally get it. It's perfect.

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