Successes
Hanging blinds
Spraying Roundup on Crabgrass (tough one, huh)
Sweeping concrete free of leaves (obsessively)
Putting furniture together (my back!)
Killing Giant Mosquito-looking bugs (where did it go? There it is!)
Failures
Connecting ice maker filter to water line (slight flood in the kitchen)
Hanging curtains (they sag in the middle; Spackle, please)
Keeping wood floors clean (my feet are black)
Fixing toilet paper holder in master bathroom (More Spackle, please)
Killing Giant Mosquito-looking bugs (What are these things called? What is this, Florida?)
Other Issues
Dripping bathtub faucet
Toilet Stoppage
Dryer voltage mismatch
Sprinkler water pressure is enough to run a water park (nice to have substantial pressure, but not nice to pelt the house and fence with water)
Stay tuned for more Floods, Bugs & Spackle. I haven't even dug into the bomb shelter yet. I've been down there a few times and from what I've seen it's an arachnid graveyard with eight-legged ghosts haunting their kin in every corner. I'll be wearing a bee keeper suit for that one. Anyone have Neil Gaiman's number (he bee keeps). That looks strange, bee keeps? Rules? Who needs 'em?
No baby yet. Wife getting restless (and still doing too much).
Oh, and I have two weeks off for Spring Break. Being a teacher pays, just not in dollars.
Writing News:
Sid Fleischman past away recently. Long live The Whipping Boy, along with several other brilliant reads. I met him at the Sayer's Lecture at UCLA a few years ago. Before I handed him my copy of The Whipping Boy, I wrote him a note on a Post-It that read: Nice Socks. He was wearing red socks that night and they were more than apparent while he crossed his legs onstage. He read the note and said, "If I knew my socks were going to draw so much attention, I wouldn't have worn them." Good ole, Sid.
Rest in Peace Mr. Fleischman.
Husband is going to be sooo jealous of the bomb shelter (he just read THE ROAD). I'm sooo excited about the baby!!! Don't forget to tell us amid the taking care of daughter, pampering wife and cooing..weeeell, I guess you can forget us, but not for longer than 10 days.
ReplyDeleteGlad that you're still itching to write. That is a good sign. We call those big mosquito-looking bugs Mosquito-eater's(they may actually eat them, I don't know) here in Minnesota. I'm guessing Neil Gaimen does too in Wisconsin. Although they probably call them something entirely different in England.
ReplyDeleteStopped for a minute and read your blog.I really like your style.
ReplyDeleteBeing a father (1st time?) will empower your writing to levels you can't imagine.
minus the sad part at the end (RIP), very funny post. hehe
ReplyDeletei wish you luck with your writing (and your house repairs!!) -- you've got a great voice :D
Word of advice from a homeowner: you will never catch up. There will always be something that needs fixing or improving.
ReplyDeleteTry what I do. Ask yourself if you really give a rat's ass, answer, "No, I'm just doing these things so my neighbors won't think I'm a bum." Realize your neighbors aren't all that impressive themselves, say the hell with fertilizing the lawn, and do something you actually want to do.
PMM - I like your style. I'm not one to keep up with the Joneses.
ReplyDeleteYou have a bomb shelter??? Are you sure it's not a tornado shelter? It sounds like you might be in the South. The bugs that look like great bi mosquitos are May Flies. (I think.) Good job on the move...Best wishes on the up coming sleepless nights, I mean baby. :) (I can say that because my baby is 14 now.)
ReplyDeleteOh, Sharon, it's a bomb shelter, no doubt. I live in Los Angeles, no tornadoes round these parts. I do like the South though, my parents live in North Central Florida, in the boondocks. This bomb shelter was built in 1961 during the Bay of Pigs. The person who owned the house (a Dr.) had the money and obviously feared the Russians like these big mosquito-looking things fear me.
ReplyDeletePictures of Bomb Shelter forthcoming.